Repeat. Year. After. Year.

Right now I’m in full on hibernation mode.

I hate leaving the house unless I absolutely have to because it’s way too cold to want to do anything. I’d much rather sit at home in comfy clothes watching Mad Men and wondering how exactly do I make an old fashioned. I have all the necessities for Project Waiting for Spring: a fridge full of wine. A puppy. A shelf full of books and tv shows on dvd. Gchat open for talks with friends. If I had a boy too, someone would probably have to physically drag me kick and screaming from here. I definitely wouldn’t emerge until late spring.

It takes a hell of a lot to get me out these days. Saturday it was lunch at DMK Burger Bar with some of my favorite Chicago girls and it was totally worth it. This coming weekend I have a movie! Valentine’s Day movie on Valentine’s Day weekend.Basically, I go out maybe once every two weeks, if that. I promise you’ll see more of me out and about when it gets nicer out.

Maybe I’m boring, lazy or lame but until you’ve been through a Chicago/Midwest winter, you have no idea. It sucks. A lot.

AND.

Rumor has it, we’re suppose to get hit with 10 inches of snow all in 24 hours.

So now you know where to find me.

Let’s cuddle.

No, I’m not kidding. See?

(I got new glasses too!)

They are metallic-y hot pink over the ear Skullcandy headphones that are slightly obnoxious if worn in public but sometimes I just might want to be slightly obnoxious and make everyone jealous that I have cooler headphones than them. Plus the sound is amazing.

But for days when I want to be slightly less obnoxious, I got a pair of earbuds (also Skullcandy) that have 3 different gel bud thingys in different sizes for a better fit which means they won’t hurt my freakish ears.

So instead of just showing off all the super cool stuff I bought, I figured I’d share some albums I’ve been listening to lately as well.

Fun – Aim and Ignite: Jessica Maria turned me on to this band. Currently loving this album. It reminds me a bit of Queen and I love that.
Elliott – False Cathedrals: one of my favorite albums of all time. It’s just pretty and perfect. Trust.
The Get Up Kids - Something to Write Home About: They issued a 10th anniversary edition of this. Can I just say how old that makes me feel? But for the record, this album is fantastic.
The Stills – Logic Will Break Your Heart: I love these Canadians. This album reminds me of summer time.
Since by Man – We Sing The Body Electric: Milwaukee hardcore. Don’t click on that unless you’re up for some screamy, heavy shit. I’ve seen them live more times than I can count. They broke up a couple years ago but dude, they are still awesome.
Fight From Above – L.A. Kids: I just heard about these dudes from Sean tonight. I liked them so much I bought the album from iTunes. That says a lot from a serial downloader.

I linked to each bands Myspace because they have music players. But if you’re nice and think you might like to hear more, email me and I’ll break into my collection and see what I can do for you.

Hi, my name is Jamie and I’m a nail polish addict.

I’ve been changing polish at least once a week, if not more. I have to hit the beauty aisle at every store I’m in to see if there is any polish I need to add to my collection. I’m running out of polish remover at an alarming rate. (You would think I’d be better at neatly painting my own nails though).

Yesterday at Sephora I bought three new colors. Sephora by OPI has the BEST colors and even BETTER names. I mean I can’t turn down a silvery grey that is also called The Queen of Everything. It was practically MADE FOR ME with that name. Or the pretty burgundy chocolately color, Caffeine Fix. Or glittery black called Never Enough Shoes. Because really, a girl can’t have enough shoes. PREACH, OPI.

Before I knew it, I was walking out the door after spending near $30 on nail polish alone.

(Let’s not do the math when you add in my new foundation, eyeliner or the Diorshow Iconic mascara I got which is AMAZING)

(All were incredibly necessary purchases so GET OFF ME)

But a nail polish habit is better than like a crack habit so that’s good, right? Unless they make crack flavored nail polish that is really pretty and has a great name because then I’d be fucked.

Being pretty and girly is expensive, dude.

P.S. Stay tuned for the post where I finally learn how to put on eyeliner unless my sister kills me first because I keep freaking out that I’m going to stab myself in the eye and she really DOES stab me in the eye to prove a point.

We’ve all had our moments where we have to wake up and check our outbox to see what exactly happened last night. I may or may not have had one of those nights after my whirlwind 26 hour Vegas trip…

But that is besides the point.

Texts From Last Night is probably one of the best and most hilarious ideas ever. Bored? Bummed? Has it been way too long of a day? Need a pick me up to send a friend? Texts From Last Night: All The Texts No One Remembers Sending will be your best friend. Not to mention when you are spending way too long doing your hair and someone is waiting for and pretty close to leaving without you, this right here can be the perfect coffee table book that distracts them!

If that hasn’t convinced you that this book is awesome here are a few of my favorites from the book that I got to preview:

(510): The party tonight has no theme but I’ve decided to go as a home wrecker.

(410): my mouth tastes like poor choices

(917): I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.

(206): how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i’m wasted? what is this phenomenon?

Right? RIGHT?!

Okay, so right about now I’m sure you’re wishing you had a copy of your own and luckily for you, I’m giving a copy away to one reader!

To enter:

• Go to textsfromlastnight.com and pick one of your favorite texts.
• Comment back here with it.
• Tweet or blog about this contest for extra entries and comment again with the link.
• Do this by Monday February 1st and you’re in!

THEY ARE ALL FUCKING LIARS.

It’s not awesome or amazing or even slightly cool. It sucks a lot.

For almost a whole month I’ve been without internet at home. Our internet company sucks so it barely worked half the time. Then we couldn’t decide if we were going stick with said company or switch to another who isn’t that great either so that took awhile. And then finally deciding to switch companies and then them not being able to come until February 1st.

One month. Without internet. #incrediblystabby

Let’s talk about how I dealt with it. Read books. Watched bad Lifetime movies about Pregnancy Pacts (HILARIOUS). Painted my nails a pretty color. Repainted my nails a pretty color. 500 Days of Summer. Hacked my iPhone to turn it into a modem.

Yeah, you read that right.

I hacked my iPhone to turn it into a modem for my laptop. (Guys, you should be incredibly turned on right now. Hell, even you girls should be.) And that worked really well most of the time. I mean, I did have issues, got kicked off a lot and issued many an apology via gchat because I missed the rest of what they were saying and can you please resend that last im?

But then gmail and reader decided to no longer work for me which is a huge pain the ass. Especially since I have to email out resumes to get people to realize exactly how awesome I am and to just HIRE ME NOW DAMMIT (interview tomorrow. holler!). Then the connection became even less reliable making it hard take care of other things I need to do like be managing editor for NextGen Chicagonista (adding new writers soon!). Posting pretty things to OHL Shops (award winning blog!). Post things here. Gchat with favorites. READ BLOGS.

Basically my life was in shambles. And still is for a few more days.

It led me to where I am now. At the library. Interneting it up with the unwashed masses. Trying not to stab teenagers in the face for giggling and trying to get boys attention by “whispering”, HEY COME HERE JOHN! Dealing with creepers lurking in the stacks. The occasional person from high school. It’s a mess but it’s five minutes away from my house.

And then, THEN my headphones busted but I still have them in my ears WITH NO MUSIC PLAYING to stop creepers and people I went to high school with from approaching me and it also helps drown out some of the sound from the teenage girls who I might stab.

So yeah, I’m still here and will be as long as I don’t get arrested for shanking someone or spontaneously combusting from Lack of Internet. But I will say, when I get said job and am finally able to get the eff out of the south side, a nearby bar with internet access will be high on my priority list for new apartment. Because it’s a proven fact that creepers are far more pleasant when drunk.

The things I do for the internets…

Send some good vibes my way today?

I could use them.

The answer: Ummmm. Did you forget that WE ARE THE INTERNET?!?!!??! And also, Yes We Can!!!

The result: Brandy and your Hot Awesome Dude… this one’s for you. Love, The Internet.

Our Plea

Our friend Brandy is a brilliant writer, a wonderful teacher, and a generous friend.  And she is in love with a man who has just been diagnosed with multiple myeloma.

We are raising money for the Multiple Myeloma Research Fund in his name.  For the price of a cinnamon dolce latte, half-caf, hold the whip, you can be part of an effort to cure a disease that affects approximately 750,000 people worldwide.

http://www.loveharder.org

Every dollar brings us a dollar closer to a cure.  And every donation brings a sliver of hope to a girl who needs all the hope she can get.

Love Harder,

Jamie

What You Can Do

• Give. Be part of a worldwide effort to cure a disease that affects approximately 750,000 people worldwide.  Every dollar helps.
• Pass it on. Forward this story to five people.  Share this blog post.  Become our fan on Facebook.
• Love harder. Life is short, love is unbending, and no one knows what could happen next. Tell someone you love them today.

Where Your Money Goes

• The American Institute of Philanthropy recently named The Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation one of the best organizations to give to in terms of their accountability and use of resources.
• By working closely with researchers, clinicians and partners in the biotech and pharmaceutical industry, the MMRF has helped bring multiple myeloma patients four new treatments that are extending lives around the globe.
• The MMRF has advanced twenty Phase I and Phase II clinical trials. They need your support to advance these clinical research programs and accelerate the development of better, more effective treatments.
• The MMRF’s Multiple Myeloma Genomics Initiative recently became the first to sequence the multiple myeloma whole genome in its entirety.
• A whopping 98% of your donation to the MMRF will be used immediately to support high-priority multiple myeloma research.
• With diminishing funding for early stage drug development and the next myeloma treatments not expected to be approved until 2011, the MMRF desperately needs your help.

DONATE: http://www.loveharder.org
CONTACT: theloveharderfund@gmail.com
FACEBOOK: http://facebook.loveharder.org
MORE INFO: http://www.themmrf.org

Okay, maybe I’m being too judgmental considering I never really dated before. I’ve always managed to kind of fall into relationships and that’s worked out just fine for me. My last relationship began as a friendship and lasted for five amazing years.

But for real, real actual dating just seems like too much work.

I mean, first you have to meet someone which is hard to do especially if you have to be like two glasses of wine in to even consider talking to the opposite sex anymore. Seriously, I use to be good at the whole flirting and boy thing. Then I got into a long term relationship, broke that off, chubbed up a bit and now it’s like I completely forgot how to talk to guys. Forget about flirting.

Then there is the whole awkward, getting to know you process where I’m just like do you really want to know how my brain works? Here is my twitter. You’ll know way more about me than you EVER wanted to because no really, I DO actually think about Zac Efron, mac and cheese and apply Mean Girls quotes to every day conversation all in the time span of about 10 minutes and VOCALIZE it.

Moving on to the “let’s meet up for coffee or some nonsense” and I’m all dude, I don’t drink coffee. I eat like a 7  year old and prefer hot chocolate with a side of chicken fingers, thanks.

(unless you want to get me drunk because clearly, we all know I’m about the wine)

Prettying myself up. Trying to pretend like I’m interesting. Showing interest. Not getting distracted by shiny, pretty things.  Making myself available. Trying to be witty and charming. The Someone Might Possibly See Me Naked in the Near Future Diet and Exercise Plan.

IT IS HARD WORK.

Which is why I decided I’m not going try to date. I’m not going to seek guys out.

I’m just going to wait.

I’m going to wait for a dude to find my blog or follow me on twitter and fall in love with me. Then he already will know about my Crazy and Ridiculous but will just think it is Quirky and Adorable so we can skip all the awkward and just get to the good stuff.

I know. I know it’s kind of the best plan ever. I don’t have to do anything except what I’m already doing.

JUST KEEP BEING AWESOME.