In case you somehow missed it, last night was the 2010 Academy Awards. I’ve seen all of like, one movie nominated (Up in the Air) but really, I totally wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity for some snarky commentary via twitter. Don’t follow me yet? DO IT.

So instead of writing a big long post, I’m just reposting my tweets because I’m awesome (lazy) like that.

• Anna Kendrick is gorgeous. I LOVE HER DRESS.
• DUDE. ZAC EFRON IS SUCH A FREAKING BABE.
• I would do bad, bad things to him, I can’t even lie.  #callmezac
• SJP got some Queen Amidala Star Wars hair going on. Not feeling it.
• I definitely wasn’t planning on live tweeting the #oscars. It’s just that I have Very Important Things to say.
• @elysa Kraft. But I’m really digging Amy’s Kitchen mac and cheese right now! (mac and cheese talk break!)
• Why is Miley Cyrus there? I can’t stand this bitch. And she needs to stop slouching. YOU’RE ON THE OSCARS RED CARPET.
• Not interested in Taylor Lautner when I have to see his face, hear him talk or see him with a shirt on.
• RT @tomandlorenzo MERYL STREEP IN CHRIS MARCH!!!!!!!!!!!!! #PROJECTRUNWAY #OSCARS
• Gabby is so cute with her posing up there.
• NPH OMG
• I would really like a sparkly dress, please.
• Amanda Seyfried is gorgeous. Miley makes me stabby. STOP TALKING.
• RDJ. Another babe.
• I want to go watch Ferris Bueller now.
• The top and bottom of Zoe Saldana’s dress don’t look like they go together.
• I love that Kanye has now been made into a verb. That broad in purple totally Kanyed that dude.
• Rachel McAdams = STUNNING.
• I type with purpose.
• What a fierce bitch. She totally knows it too. (re: costume designer’s win)
• STOP SLOUCHING KSTEW. (Her dress is so pretty though)
• MY BB ZAC OMG.
• Elizabeth Banks dress is ridic. I’m in love.
• More babes. Less boring.
• A suited up Bradley Cooper is the best kind of Bradley Cooper.

The summary for the tl;dr crowd: Babes. Sparkles. Stop slouching. Who invited the Disney kids? Boring. And apparently I have no comments on the actually awards because I just don’t care. Now can someone just let me write for Gawker now or something, please?

Best dressed? Worst dressed? Did you actually watch the movies unlike me and think the awards we’re given out to the right people?

DO TELL.

P.S. I would also like this dress.

P.P.S. And this one:

P.P.P.S. But mainly this one as long as I don’t have to have Cameron Diaz’s face:

It is pretty obvious that I’m a big Twilight geek. I just can’t help it.

Those of you who have read it know that it is like crack. Moody, glittery vampire crack that I distributed and pushed on you all. My own copy has made some rounds and converted quite a few here in Chicago.

And to those of you who scoff and say you don’t like angsty teen vampire novels, I was the same way. NOW LOOK AT ME.

Then when you add RPattz to the picture? I’m done for.

So when Katelin got to meet and interview the cast, I pretty much was freaking out all weekend for her with each text I received and that led to this brief conversation with my sister (ignore the mural part, that was a response to a previous question).

Obviously sad pathetic fan girls don’t say fuck.

Only awesome ones do.

P.S. “Jamie in Chicago” from this video interview with him is me. RPattz knows I exist.This clearly means I’m better than you. (except for Katelin because she got to meet him)
P.P.S. And basically that we are getting married.
P.P.P.S. Registered at Pottery Barn, what up.
P.P.P.P.S. Haters to the mother fucking left.
P.P.P.P.P.S. This is probably the most ridiculous post I have ever written.

Truly a legend who changed the face of music.

He will be missed.

Rest In Peace

I am a shameless lover of celebrity news. I know exactly what Britney is up too. I’m up to speed on my Jonas Brother / Miley fueds and love affairs. What’s up with Grey’s Anatomy George and Izzy next season? I can tell you. Lindsay Lohan is following around Sam Ronson like a puppy? Old news but can you believe she still thinks leggings are pants and is making money off that?

Basically I’m on top of my celeb gossip game. It’s kind of sad but kind of AWESOME.

But what I don’t do is Perez Hilton. I think is a fame hungry idiot. Yeah, everyone talks shit about Britney’s crazy or whatever but when you feel the need to start outting celebs and being an all around douchebag, I’m over it.

It seems like yesterday Perez got his. will.i.am from the Black Eye Peas got all in his face because Perez was running his mouth on his ridiculous ad infested web site. Whatever, no biggie. But then will.i.am’s manager decided to punch Perez in the face a few times.

But you know what? I don’t feel sorry for him one bit, not even after watching his tear filled video claiming violence is never the answer.

He’s right that violence is never the answer. What pisses me off  about this whole situation is that Perez decided he wouldn’t be intimidated. And to show he wasn’t afraid he decided to call will.i.am a “fucking faggot” because it’s the “worst thing a thug would ever want to hear”.

Really?

An openly gay man and supporter of equal rights is going to call someone else a “faggot” to degrade them? Way to promote hatred and intolerance toward your own community. That just doesn’t seem right to me.

I’m incredibly interested in how Perez will clean this up and try to make nice.

EDIT

After GLAAD urges Perez to apologize for his anti-gay slurs, he hits back with:

“I am saddened GLAAD chose to victimize me further by criticizing me for how I non-violently dealt with a very scary situation that, unfortunately, turned violent. While I doubt I will get an apology from GLAAD, nor do I expect one, I would just hope people know how difficult it is to intellectualize a situation and think rationally when a thug disguised as a musician is screaming at your face and intimidating you. I am just very fortunate and grateful that nothing more serious happened to me.”

Someone should hit him again for his stupidity.

Heath Ledger is dead.

Poor baby, Matilda

It’s believed to be an overdose.