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Job hunting sucks. A lot. So since I’m currently looking for a new job, I decided to do some soul searching and see what I would really like to do right now. I came up with a list of jobs I think I would be awesome for:

Official Macaroni and Cheese Taste Tester. This one is a given. Pasta. Cheese. Money. Heaven. All mac and cheese will have to go through me to get approval before everyone else can try it.
America’s Next Top Model Judge. We all know I’m a judgey bitch when it comes to Tyra and her girls so why not get rid of Paulina? Or you know what, eff that – let’s get rid of Tyra and I’ll take over. I can smile with my eyes with the best of them.
Etsy Shopper Extraordinaire. Duh. People will give me money and I buy everything I like from Etsy. And I keep it. What? I never said I was your personal shopper. Just a shopper. Unless you personally need help buying me something.
Lifetime Movie Script Writer. I think I’ve already adequately covered this one.
Expert Puppy Cuddler. I mean I have this adorable puppy who I love to cuddle. Maybe I can help other people whose pets need some cuddles. Going out of town and have to board? I’ll stop in and give them a snuggle. Or animal shelters can hire me to come it and cuddle with the puppies.
Hair Product Critic. I’m a big fan of my hair. I think it’s pretty. How about a quest to the perfect hair products to acquire the most amazing head of hair possible? I think I’m up for that challenge.
Professional Movie Quoter. Basically I’ll just talk in movie quotes. Who doesn’t love a little Mean Girls or Wedding Crashers thrown into every day conversation? People who fail at life, that’s who.
Twitter Goddess. Goddesses are underrated. Everyone is a Princess now a days. Princess of this… Queen of that… I’m feeling Goddess-y. Why not be a Goddess of something I love – like Twitter? I’m good at tweeting. Plus, I’m sure Britney Spears would totally want a Goddess on her social media team, right? I mean it would be stupid not to!

I know, I know. These are pretty awesome job ideas and you’re jealous you didn’t think of them first. Want to invent one of these jobs and hire me to do? Get at me.

Your turn. If you could have any job in the world what would it be?

(P.S. Make sure you resubscribe to my feed using THIS link.)

21 Comments so far

I vote for writing the Lifetime script. I’d totally watch!

[Reply]

I woudle be an official make-up/nail polish/hair product namer. How awesome would that be? Names like Raspberry Tart and Twitter Tangerine…God, I’m amazing.

Dude, they already fired Paulina! You’re a shoe-in for this!! I’ll be looking for you next season!

Right now I am looking for my own personal DJ. Someone who just follows me around playing songs for me all day.

you in?

it doesnt pay much… but you know, the economy is bad right now.

i think puppy farm runner is better for you. because youd have many puppies to cudds with and friends for ediepuff.

Love it! Great blog.

If you get someone to fund any of those jobs, let us know your secret!

I’ve always wanted to open a store that only sells soft things. I’m thinking of calling it “fuzzy.” Alternatively, my mom and I have dreams of opening a bookstore/cafe where we’ll do all of the baking…

Professional TV-watcher. I’m damn good at plopping my ass on that couch. I could be a pro. No doubt.

I think I would like to try all of these career ventures as well. I vote for Lifetime Movie script writer…it seems like the easiest.

i could help you with the mac and cheese tasting. that would be superb.

but my dream job would involve movie watching and popcorn eating, it would be amazing. one day i’ll get there.

I’d like to be a professional pizza connoisseur.

Official Mac and Cheese Taster? That would be the best job in the world, right up there with recipe taster for an Ice Cream Company.

I like this! Will definitely write an entry about it. I like that a lot of them are about “critiquing” – says something about your (valued) opinions, eh?

I like the options you’ve set here, but why settle for one? I’m down for being a mac & cheese taster / movie quoter / twitter. Now I just need to come up with a shorter title.

lovely post -so fun! I wouldn’t mind doing the official macaroni and cheese taste tester!

Love it. I was literally laughing out loud–I would make a great Etsy Shopper. I think I would also make a good blog reader–I’ll read all the unread posts in your reader, and then report back to you with a summary. How does that sound?

I’d love to be a professional macaroni and cheese taste tester. Professional puppy cuddling is up there too.

I think Official Macaroni and Cheese Taste Tester sounds like a great job to me!

That’s rad! I’m so glad I’m not the only one who’s inventing up new jobs in my head that would be a welcome opportunity versus what I’m doing right now. My idea is to be a professional internet surfer. You need something but don’t have time to find it or you’ve found it but want it for a smaller price – I’m your girl. I’ll find it and find it fast. Maybe we should team up cuz I kinda like your macaroni idea…

dude. those sound like awesome jobs.

if you need a reference for the hair one lemme know.

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