{ jamieann dot net } » Blog Archive » she couldn’t get enough

she couldn’t get enough

April 27, 2009 | ridiculous things, shameless

and it led to her demise…

Sounds like a Lifetime movie title and opening, doesn’t it?

(Maybe. Sorta. Kinda. No? Okay, fine.)

Well, that’s my problem. I CAN’T get enough.

Of Lifetime movies, that is.

No, seriously. On the chance that I am home, whether I have a some time to actually watch tv or am working on something else, chances are Lifetime is on in the background with some poorly acted movie with Tori Spelling or about being unknowingly drugged to steal the wife and best friend’s inheritance.

It’s like crack. I just can’t turn away.

The fourteen year olds in high school who spread syphilis to all their classmates because they were screwing 10-15 dudes and the little virgin one is told she looks like Angelina Jolie so duh, she joins in the fun and gets it too.

Then LeAnn Rimes who finds her dad whose been dead for 10 years in a cave in a Alaska and falls in love with the new sheriff who, of course, solves the case.

(Which is also the movie where she meets the dude she has an affair with and cheats on her supposedly gay husband. No, that part is real life but it could totally be made into a movie. Maybe Tori Spelling can play LeAnn Rimes?)

And there is Lacey Chabert who is adopted but her real mom comes back and she gets a cat bank and finds out that OMG! it’s the police officer who is suppose to help her that is the killer and NO WAY! he is framing her dad.

(Lacey Chabert has the most annoying voice. For serious.)

I have yet to stumble across a teen pregnancy or eating disorder movie but with the way things are going it’s only a matter of time.

Maybe I should start thinking about a future career as a Lifetime movie writer? I think I have enough cheese and drama in me to crank out some really great ones.

Let’s just consider this little confession “my research” and never talk about it again.

(well until you see my name in credits as the writer for ‘She Was Too Young part 37′)

Seriously, people. CRACK.

* I’m so looking forward to the search hits I get with this one. STDs and Angelina Jolie in one post, that’s practically blasphemy.
** Lifetime, call me!

48 Comments so far
Leave a comment

I was searching for “Lifetime od crack” and it led me straight here.

Weird.

of. Lifetime OF crack.

but od, kind of works too. eh.

Do you know who is addicted to Lifetime that I think is hilarious? My DAD!!!

I remember the one with Tracey Gold where she suffers from an eating disorder. I think Zack Morris played her brother. For the love of Nancy? Something like that? I remember at the end of the movie, she was eating a bagel in the kitchen and everyone was all proud.

I love me some Army Wives on Lifetime. Though I honestly don’t believe that real army wives have that much drama. Hell they have bombs going off and stalkers. I think the Army would ask those ladies to leave the base….

I can’t stand Lifetime movies, which makes me sad b/c it seems like something I’d love. I always read the plot summaries and I try to watch it, but they just move too slow for me…

Jackies last blog post..$500 shopping sprees make me happy

Lacey Chabert doesn’t only sound annoying, she moves annoyingly too. Watch her.LOl.

I am in total agreement with you on how annoying Lacey Chabert’s voice is!

Paulas last blog post..THE STRANGEST BUS TOUR EVER . . .

I remember one winter about 10 years ago when I was single that I spent every single Sunday lying in my little living room watching 1 Lifetime movie after another. There was 1 with the chick from the Facts of Life (yes I know you are too young to have watched this show – just hush and nod) and her husband beats the sh*t out of her with a tire iron – I still cringe when I think of it.

Michelle Smiless last blog post..Haagen Dazs Friday

I totally know the one where the little Angelina girl gets an STD! I almost fell off the couch when she said to her mom, “It’s just oral!” Ugh. I stopped watching Lifetime after that. I just couldn’t do it anymore.

Erins last blog post..A half-step is 50% of a whole step

I wanted to catch one of the new ones with Smith Jarred from Sex and the ity. But, I missed it…

Angelas last blog post..Going Nowhere

i did a marathon one weekend myself =)

i hate lifetime movies, but if i watch one i just can’t move away from the tv. they have some sort of magical powers.

Sarahs last blog post..Puppy!

I have never watched a lifetime movie, but obviously I need to! Anything with Lacey Chabert takes me back into the squeaky voiced lands of yester year…

Kyla Romas last blog post..Around the Corner

I. Love. Lifetime.

That is all!

Beauty of Arguments last blog post..Sunday Tidbits

I can’t judge. I watched back-to-back episodes of “Gilmore girls” the other day on a Canadian channel called W. (The W stands for “Women” and not “Well you are very manly.”)

Peters last blog post..You know it’s time that we grow old and do some shit

what in the world is a cat bank??? and what is the name of that movie because it sounds like a good laugh waiting to be had.

thatShortChicks last blog post..Will: "You funny lady." Val: "And you gay fella."

One of my good friends interned in the Lifetime movie department and had to read script submissions. If you think what makes it to TV is ridiculous, just imagine the kinds of things aspiring Made-For-TV movie writers are sending in. Some of the stories I’ve been told about are epic.

i think every female at one point or another has been addicted to this form of crack. that and law and order SVU. its just an inevitable part of growing into adulthood.

loves it.

bodelous last blog post..its too beautiful outside to go to sleep.

I’m glad to see there are so many other people out there. I honestly spent an entire Saturday watching the Nora Roberts’ romance novels turned movie series. The entire time I’m thinking, “These are so cheesy. Why can I not look away?”

You’re right. It is like crack.

Lifetime is one thing I miss about cable — it’s been years since I’ve watched a good Lifetime movie.

My favorite is Death of a Cheerleader, which just so happens to have Tori Spelling and the girl from Life Goes On. It’s a classic.

A Super Girls last blog post..Only a month late

Ah Lifetime… the original, the best, dealer of crap-addicts everywhere…Oh how I miss you! Oh how I relied on you whenever I was sick and drugged out of my mind on cough syrup. Everything else requires too much thinking.

Kittys last blog post..Dare to Be You…

Have you seen the one with Raven from “That’s So Raven?” My friend Katie is in it as the trader friend. I made a male friend watch it with me – I think he hated me for a bit afterward.

Laurens last blog post..Book Review: The Time Traveler’s Wife

I am obsessed with Lifetime Movies! If I turn that channel on I can’t walk away!

(Dine Out, Fight AIDS. April 30. http://www.diningoutforlife.com)

Marissas last blog post..Dine Out, Fight AIDS. 4-30-2009

I just watched a Lifetime movie yesterday about a sex addict who can;t stop. It was riveting!

Meghans last blog post..My Mouth is My Weapon and I’m All Outta Ammo.

You need to watch The Party Never Stops with Sara Paxton…it is so unintentionally hilarious. I also remember after they aired Human Trafficking one of my roommates and I had to sleep in the same bed because we were so afraid of being drafted into sex slavery when we weren’t paying attention

Maras last blog post..Blue M&Ms

Okay, I’ve watched Lifetime twice in my life and I’m not joking you, I ended up seeing the syphilis movie!

stealthnerds last blog post..NYC Blogger Meetup!

Saw the Leanne Rimes movie. Mediocre, at best!

mariss last blog post..Buon Appetito – The Urban Kitchen Makes Pasta from Scratch

Sounds every bit as good as network daytime.

Wardells last blog post..Wardell Design WordCamp Chicago Giveaway

Jaimie!
You must watch Sarah Haskins Target Women: Lifetime episode. I promise it will crack you up.

Sarahs last blog post..A tale of two siblings

i totally agree, lifetime movies are ridiculously addictive. so horrible but so good.

katelins last blog post..Big Birthday, even bigger news!

Is it wrong that I have seen most of those?

Janes last blog post..Because how would that even come up?

Are these all the Nora Roberts’ movies? I heard about them on the radio, but didn’t get to see any!

Jackies last blog post..Awake

You said you haven’t seen one yet about teen pregnancy or eating disorders? I totally have. When I was doing my teaching practicum in an 8th grade health class, all the teacher would ever do is show Lifetime movies that she taped off of her TV. She had a movie for every health related issue: depression, suicide, bullying, teen sex, drug addictions, etc. At first it was okay but then it got boring because I had to watch the same 40 minute segment six times a day.

This totally reminded me of how when i was in high school my mom and i would spend an afternoon sometimes just lazing about napping in our living room watching lifetime.

My mom was totally a lifetime addict. Those movies absolutely suck you in. I can’t believe you haven’t seen one about teen pregnancy or eating disorders!! I thought those were all they showed

heidis last blog post..Are you ready for Gold Cup?

I used to be SO obsessed, but their movies have gotten a little out of hand for me. I guess that’s the point, but I need a little more reality in my plots.

Maxies last blog post..10 things I hate about everything.

this post is too funny because I can totally relate! I always get sucked in by Lifetime movies with their cheesy and unbelievable plot lines. I think it’s funny too (well maybe not funny, exactly) that for a channel focused on women, a lot of their movies feature women characters making wrong decisions in life and relationships, getting cheated on or beat up! still, it is like crack.

and to Lily, I remember that Tracey Gold movie too and the bagel scene! ha, that was so long ago.

Carissas last blog post..Bow and Arrow

I’ve seen all of the above mentioned lifetime love fests. That’s what tivo is for in my house. Lifetime only.

Just Playing Pretends last blog post..Let’s See If You Bastards Can Do Ninety

I used to love lifetime, like you I would usually just have it in the background, but then end up really getting into the most outrageous plot they have. I haven’t watched it in a long time, I was tired of watching the same ones over and over again!

Laurens last blog post..Shake it

I absolutely love LifeTime movies! They are so cheesy, it’s unbelievable. She’s Too Young is my favorite. So much goodness!

Erins last blog post..The "Put a Ring on it" Phenomena

have fun!!!

freeteymes last blog post..Look: Not So Blue

Since we are sharing shameless secrets, I will admit that I recently finished reading sTORI Telling, Tori Spelling’s autobiography. She actually makes many references to her numerous Lifetime movies, and makes fun of herself for it. It was rather humorous, I thought!

Lexis last blog post..gezuar ditelindjen Majlinda!

This is one of the reasons we don’t have cable. I could watch for days. Mother, May I Sleep With Danger is my all time favorite.

[...] Now back to my Saturday Lifetime movie marathon. Yeah, you know it. [...]

[...] Lifetime Movie Script Writer. I think I’ve already adequately covered this one. [...]

[...] Now back to my Saturday Lifetime movie marathon. Yeah, you know it. [...]

[...] for two hours, it’s hard not to get sucked in. Plus, it’s on Lifetime and we all know my weakness when it comes to that goddamn channel. But yeah, so there was an episode last week that ends all, “5 years later…” and [...]

[...] life. Working for crazy people. Cheeseburger parties. Reading through the Chicago Public Library. Developing an obsession with Lifetime. Cheesecake dates. Adorable little French girls. Getting my first official pedicure. The fourth [...]

RSS feed for comments on this post.

TrackBack URI

Leave a comment

All content, unless otherwise noted, © 2008 { jamieann dot net }
Blog design by Splendid Sparrow

hit counter